JACK ROSENBLOOM – ON FINDING THE VALUE

The other guests

It can be very frustrating having spent hours diligently searching for the perfect hotel only to arrive there and find that, while the building and location are perfect, the other guests are not what you had expected. For example, you think you have found an undiscovered hotel in Phuket only to find that the hotel is almost completely block-booked by Hong Kong tour operators and you are one of the few Europeans there. Or you find yourself taking a holiday in what appears to be a convention hotel where the peaceful resort atmosphere is spoilt by rowdy businessmen in the bar at night and the swimming pool is deserted during the day until late in the afternoon when the delegates take it over. Last month, we mentioned that Star Cruises markets its short Asian cruises specifically at the local gambling market, as well as local families with children, whereas in Europe they are pitched at mid-market and middle-aged package tourists who probably have little interest in gambling or children.

A few weeks ago, the press had a great time when Thomson was sued by a client because there were ‘too many Germans in the hotel’. He won the case but that was not the reason. The company advertised childcare facilities but, since they were German-speaking, the client did not feel they were acceptable.

Tour operators and hotel agents often fail to mention facts that can have an impact on your stay. For example, the Hyatt in Acapulco is famous not just for its prime position on the beach but because it has one of the very few kosher restaurants in Mexico. Understandably, it attracts a large number of American Jews, particularly over Jewish holidays when non-Jews could find themselves in a minority. A number of agents sell this hotel without any reference to the kosher restaurant. I know of a couple of hotels in the Mediterranean that feature rooftop sundecks where nudity is not just allowed but encouraged. Some would consider this a plus factor; others, rather a negative one, but the hotels are sold by agents who make no reference to the terrace at all. Since the hotels are not actively marketing themselves as ‘nude friendly’, they probably feel no mention is necessary, but I am far from sure. Tropical Locations is one of the very few tour operators that mention the mix of tourists a resort attracts. Comments such as “Penang is particularly popular with families from the Middle East in the summer” (low season) and references to “the Costa Foster” in Bali ensure their clients will not get a surprise.

None of these issues is necessarily a disaster. There is nothing wrong with a hotel that is full of Hong Kong Chinese and a holidaymaker may even prefer to stay in a convention hotel where most guests work during the day, thus leaving the leisure facilities very quiet. Nor would we worry unduly about a cruise ship being marketed at different types of customer depending on their origin. Most vessels are large enough to cater for a variety of interests. However, it certainly helps to know what mix of clientele your hotel or cruise ship is trying to encourage.

Of course, a hotel could have several different types of guest, depending on the season. Even a major conference hotel is likely to be full of tourists in August, and some high-class business hotels can go surprisingly casual at weekends when they try to attract tour groups to fill their rooms. Quite a few luxury resort hotels go dramatically downmarket in their low seasons when they could sell a large block of rooms to tour operators – not so good if you have booked direct with the hotel and expect the exclusive atmosphere they try to foster in the high season.

You can never be absolutely sure of the mix of clients a hotel is trying to attract, but here are a few tips:

• However you have booked, you should look at the hotel’s own website. If the hotel boasts about its convention facilities, you should take note. Remember, no tour operator or hotel agent is going to make a point of mentioning such facilities, because they would imagine they are irrelevant to their guests.
• Look at what languages the hotel’s site is produced in. See if there are remarks about special services or regional restaurants. A hotel in Thailand that features a Chinese and/or Japanese restaurant is likely to be aiming for guests from those markets. Similarly, a hotel on the Algarve that has a site available in Portuguese, English and German could be making a point if one of their bars is kitted out as an Austrian beer cellar.
• Even if you know the website address of the hotel, you should still Google it to see what comes up. If you do this with Star Cruises, you will see the words ‘casino’ and ‘gambling’ mentioned in several of the entries. Do not just look down the first page but keep going through the list to see how many agents are quoting the hotel and any other interesting clues.
• Some hotels may have a significant niche market, which agents will only allude to in the vaguest of terms. The remark that a hotel allows topless bathing by its pool could suggest that the hotel is popular with nudists (a growing and profitable market in the Mediterranean apparently), while ‘bohemian clientele’ probably means they have a lot of gay guests. If you are suspicious, try Googling ‘Nude Palace Hotel’ or ‘Gay Palace Hotel’ to see if any reference appears.
• You should also try to look at which agents are selling the hotel. Is it featured by a large range of UK package-tour companies? If you go to a price comparison site such as Travelsupermarket, do several agents appear? If the answer is no, then you may want to try to work out exactly from where they do get their clients. Sometimes, it can pay to stay in a hotel that is featured by many UK companies: if a beach hotel in Egypt is being sold at a special last-minute rate and you cannot see the hotel featured in many UK brochures, the chances are it will be block-booked by either Italian and/or Russian tour operators

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False luxury

For the last few months, I have been writing about the way hoteliers like to bombard their guests with superficial luxury and ‘design highlights’ (such as extravagantly decorated lobbies) and ignore the real comforts of a hotel, like providing shower doors that close properly and plumbing systems that do not make a noise. The following is a true story – indeed, it is so ridiculous, I could hardly have made it up.

A friend of mine is a designer and normally works on new homes for the seriously rich. He has just been commissioned to redesign the swimming pool for a well-known hotel. I checked on the hotel’s site and the pool is shown as having been renovated in 2003. I asked my friend why they wanted to spend more money on it so soon. The answer was depressingly obvious.

The current pool functions perfectly well. Guests like it and the setting is stunning, with fabulous views. It is genuinely a highlight of the hotel. That is part of the problem. The hotel regards it as its major selling point, but in its current state it is very hard to photograph to good advantage. All you really get is a photograph of blue water and blue sky, which is not enough to make the required impact on a website. The hotel has hired the designer, not necessarily to create a better pool but to tinker with the current one so it becomes more photogenic!

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